A Truth Journal: CIA Petraeus Scandal: What New Lies Is He Telling About His Affair?

Top: Paula Broadwell with back to camera talks to Petraeus.

A Truth Journal: CIA Petraeus Scandal: What New Lies Is He Telling About His Affair?: From Denny:   Gen. David Petraeus has been found to have gamed the time line of his affair.  He claims the affair ended four months ago in the summer.  If that is true then why is he seen with Paula Broadwell at the premier status and very close knit intelligence community dinner of the OSS Society?

The only people invited to that event are former or current CIA directors, top level military and those with ties to the WWII era predecessor of the CIA, the Office of Strategic Services (OSS).

Paula Broadwell is not and never has been a top level military commander, has zero ties to WWII,  the French Resistance, the OSS or even the CIA - except for sleeping with the CIA Director Petraeus.  Oh wait, she is guilty of shameless social climbing, home wrecking, name dropping, getting kicked out of Harvard's doctoral program and gossiping in public speeches sensitive and classified information.  Yes, that.

Dennys Funny Quotes: Scotland Govt Shut Down Child Food Critic of School Lunches But She Rebounds Anew

Dennys Funny Quotes: Scotland Govt Shut Down Child Food Critic of School Lunches But She Rebounds Anew: From Denny:  A couple of months ago this happened:  Can you believe this crazy stunt?  A precocious nine-year-old, Martha Payne, decides she is fed up with the poor standard of school lunches so she starts photographing them.  Then she put them up on her blog, Never Seconds.

She is quite the observant food critic too.  She spots ugly things like hair in her food.  Oddly enough, she actually liked this garbage on a plate in this photo.  Kids do love mac 'n' cheese and jello, and, to her, these were infrequent treats.

On Martha's blog school kids from other countries sent her photos of their school lunches.  They certainly don't look as bare as this plate.  Apparently, Scottish kids actually like - and will eat radishes - not so here in America.  Radishes are great for your sinuses and good for staving off colds.  Since she lives in a cold climate it's good she enjoys them.

This plucky little girl hails from a Scottish coastal town called Lochgilphead which is about 130 miles west of  Edinburgh.  She caused quite a stir in her area by revealing the awful food truth.

Normal is Boring iPhone 4 Slider Case

Throw out your funny challenge of the day - Normal is Boring... Step Aside

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The Social Poets: 2012 London Olympics: Olympic Boner, Funny Late Nite Jokes, Colbert, Stewart Videos

Rally to Restore Sanity and/or Fear (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

The Social Poets: 2012 London Olympics: Olympic Boner, Funny Late Nite Jokes, Colbert, Stewart Videos: From Denny:  The London 2012 Olympics took the world TV watching community by storm in record numbers.

That, and with the global economic meltdown we are all too poor to go out so we holiday indoors with our monster TVs for free, right?  The Olympics have proven to be some exciting stuff, something for everyone.

Of course, our national comics have enjoyed a bit of commentary.  Enjoy the laughs as the Olympics winds down into its last week.

Stephen Colbert and Jon Stewart video clips are sure to make you laugh right off your chair!  The Stewart clip about the rower with the "two mice hugging a banana" is funnier than the photo of the famous Olympic Boner.  All that for just a bronze medal? :)

Funny Nobody is Perfect Laptop Skins

Smile while you promote yourself with satire

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The Social Poets: Obamas Axelrod, Bushs Rove: How Corrupt Are They? Have They Hurt The Country?

President Barack Obama talks with White House Chief of Staff Rahm Emanuel and Senior Advisor David Axelrod during the flight from Paris to Caen, Normandy, June 6, 2009 in the Boeing C-32A (usually the Vice President and First Family air plane) being used as Air Force One. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

The Social Poets: Obamas Axelrod, Bushs Rove: How Corrupt Are They? Have They Hurt The Country?: From Denny:  If Obama's Axelrod's lips are moving, then it must be a lie.  Same goes for Bush's Rove.  They both have strongly demonstrated they are political opportunists and willing money whores, selling out to the highest bidder.

For more than the past four years I've watched this political strategist called David Axelrod.  He claims to be a Democrat but has yet to convince me this is true.

Like I said, his lips are moving but his deeds say different.  What has happened is that he has been found out in so many lies, misstatements and half-truths that they are piled so high upon one another like a pile of bones on a weathered battlefield - out in the open for all to see.

His latest gaffe is "leaking national security secrets" like the special computer virus that so annoyed the Iran regime at their nuclear facilities.  Of course, he "protests too much" that everyone strongly suspects he personally did it.

Funny Coffee Demand Men's Fitted T-Shirt

Ahem... COFFEE! with steaming cup of joe just in case anyone has any doubts as to what you need right now

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The Social Poets: John Stewart and Colbert Mock LIBOR Credit Card Scandal

The Social Poets: John Stewart and Colbert Mock LIBOR Credit Card Scandal: From Denny:  Want to learn more about just how deep the global banking scandal goes?  But we want to laugh our way through the tutorial, right?  Look no further as both national comedians are here to guide us through a couple of hilarious tutorials that will have you grinning so wide your house will split apart.

It will also make you want to get your shotgun (if you own one) and run right down to the "hallowed halls" of the financial sector and join the Occupy protesters.  Now, more than ever, have the protesters succeeded in convincing us that all credit card holders are just financial slaves, doomed to serve the whims of Big Bank Sluts and Congress Whores, both whose masters are Greed.

But first a couple of facts to bring you up to speed in case your eyes glaze over when the financial guys on the news start talking:

Funny Flying Pig Snowflake Ornament

Funny Pig quote: Never try to teach a pig to sing: it wastes your time and it annoys the pig.

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The Social Poets: Im Just Saying: Funny Way To Stop Scam Pest Callers

Logo for the United States National Do Not Call Registry. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

The Social Poets: Im Just Saying: Funny Way To Stop Scam Pest Callers: From Denny:  So we know the national Do Not Call Registry is pretty much a waste of time.  Scammers call anyway.  There are so many of them they are like roaches running away from a can of bug spray.

The problem is so rampant that you wonder if the government does more than just fine them in order to put more money into their political campaigns and the national treasury.  The wronged citizen sees no money, no justice and certainly no peace of mind away from these scammers.  Just how can we get rid of these telepests?


Checking out various sites where we can report these scammer callers it's the usual standard fare:  people are surprised, curious, in need of anger management.  But on one site a particular comment caught my eye.

Before I could finish reading it I was laughing so hard I practically did fall off my chair.

Dennys: News Politics Comedy Science Arts & Food: 15 Funny Tasty July Fourth Posts

Dennys: News Politics Comedy Science Arts & Food: 15 Funny Tasty July Fourth Posts: From Denny:  Hope everyone is enjoying their holiday time off.  It certainly is hotter than ever this summer.  And we have global warming to enjoy for years to come.  So laugh a lot while you are figuring out how to adapt to this new extreme weather sport:  scorching summers.

Meanwhile, I have some great photography to give you a smile and some amusing poems to read while you try some new recipes.  Be sure to check out the July Fourth quotes both funny and serious that will certainly make you think.  Happy July Fourth!

America Mug

America: Does it get any better?

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The Social Poets: Im Just Saying: Funny Way 4 U.S. Govt 2 Handle Mexican Drug Smugglers

Images of Strauss-Kahn's perp walk were condemned in France, where it is illegal to publish such photos before the subject is convicted. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

The Social Poets: Im Just Saying: Funny Way 4 U.S. Govt 2 Handle Mexican Drug Smugglers: From Denny:  Take a peek inside a living room as Middle Class America watches the news, offering up outrageous solutions to the nation's ills.

For decades, Mexican drug smugglers have been devising all kinds of effective methods to penetrate the American coastline.  The news anchor seems to think the various government agencies have proven effective at containing the Mexican drug smugglers on land.

Lately - yes, this is a real news story - the smugglers have turned to retrofitting simple Mexican fishing boats with multiple engines to skim across the water so fast you might blink your eyes and miss them.

Apparently, the Coast Guard and other government agencies working in unison, are on watch every night, seeking out the more than several dozen runs by the smugglers all along the California coastline.

This news clip shows how the law enforcement agencies are successful, and arresting all kinds of smugglers, all lined up for The Perp Walk.

Yeah, Middle America is sitting on the couch taking it all in, fidgeting with the remote, when a stellar idea pops into their heads.  All that arrest business sure is a lot of unnecessary work.  We have a more effective solution of how to deal with these cheesy Mexican smugglers.

The Social Poets: Rush Limbaugh: 3 Funny Colbert, Stewart Videos, Late Nite Jokes

The Social Poets: Rush Limbaugh: 3 Funny Colbert, Stewart Videos, Late Nite Jokes: From Denny:  Did you hear?  Today another advertiser turned tail and ran away from Rush Limbaugh.  This time it was Kohler, manufacturer of those stylish faucets and other kitchen and bath fixtures.  That makes 143 advertisers, with about 9 left in his smelly pervert corner.

Of course, I'm sitting in a diner having lunch today in the red state of Louisiana, with the channel tuned to the ridiculous Fox News, and who is featured?

You guessed it, Fat Boy Blowhard Rush Limbaugh.  The amusing thing is that the love affair with Fox News and Rush Limbaugh is waning even here in the deep South.  "Can I Tell Ya?" that the only person watching the screen was the liberal blogger in the room.  Everyone else was treating Rush like he is so last year fashionista.

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The Social Poets: Groundhog Day: How Many Talented Psychic Rodents In America?

The Social Poets: Groundhog Day: How Many Talented Psychic Rodents In America?: This is the stuffed, ok, taxidermied groundhog, known as Potomac Phil that hails from Washington, D.C. He gets wheeled out to the Dupont Circle Ground Hog Day celebration to determine whether he sees his shadow or not. Not sure who the human political hack is for him to make the announcement. But hey, the new burgeoning club played polka music to honor him.

His fans are hoping to raise enough money to replace him with a live groundhog next year. Until then, Potomac Phil continues to trash talk his beltway imitator Punxsutawney Phil in Pennsylvania.

And what is Punxsutawney Phil's response to this stuffed upstart? "Ah, Potomac Phil is Newt Gingrich's first cousin, all trash talk and no money. I'm the real deal since 1887."

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The Social Poets: Funny 2012 Election Late Nite Jokes and Videos

The Social Poets: Funny 2012 Election Late Nite Jokes and Videos: From Denny: With the holiday season yesterday's news, it's time to catch up on the hilarious jokes from the late night comics about the GOP candidates and their utterly lame "debates." These are all the jokes from December 2011 and half of January 2012.

As the political season wears on - and wears out the goodwill of the public - the jokes will only get sharper as the political attacks get nastier. Put on your hockey face mask as the Zingers are about to get hurled at you from every angle during the next 11 months.

All the major news networks are now calling for some serious fact-checking on those GOP claims pooped out onto the airwaves.

You know it's really bad when the mainstream news starts complaining about the very guys who buy the ads on their networks that they encouraged to behave so badly in the first place. Do you think it might have something to do with the fact the majority of the public is not paying attention to those silly debates?

The Social Poets: Check Out This Video: Worlds Fastest Flying Human

Image via Wikipedia

The Social Poets: Check Out This Video: Worlds Fastest Flying Human: From Denny: Check out this Norwegian wingsuit flyer/paraglider as he leaps off a high cliff and soars a mile or so over the mountains near a river. He finally pulls his chute open to finish the last glide to land easily on the road where a car is waiting to take him home.

What a rush! He looked like a speeding bullet to the camera crew on the ground as he crested the mountain range. He just zoomed on past them, going maybe well over 130 mph? Turns out he was clocked at 250km/hour - which is 155 mph.

Norwegian Espen Fadnes thought this outdoor activity would be a fun experience for the weekend. He has donned his wingsuit and performed this crazy feat so many times he has earned the dubious honor of World's Fastest Flying Human. In fact, last year he jumped off the Swiss Alps in an international competition, taking home the win.

Ouch Outrageous Obnoxious and Odd: Close Encounter Planes Fly Over Your Beach Vacation

Image via Wikipedia

Ouch Outrageous Obnoxious and Odd: Close Encounter Planes Fly Over Your Beach Vacation: From Denny: Check out just how low these planes are when they come in for a landing over Maho Beach at St. Maarten Princess Juliana International Airport in the Caribbean. People actually go to vacation here just to experience the dangerous jet blasts from the landings.

In the second video you will see people falling down on the sand and get blasted by what looks like a mini sand storm. Be sure to bring your safety glasses with you when you go to experience this new cheap thrill for tourists! :)

Dennys Funny Quotes: Calling In Sick To Your Boss: 15 Funniest New Excuses

Dennys Funny Quotes: Calling In Sick To Your Boss: 15 Funniest New Excuses: From Denny: When you don't feel like going in to work, pull out your little Black Book Of Funny Excuses. Well, there is a new edition in town since a career survey was conducted.

During the colder weather of autumn and winter most people call in sick due to illness like colds and flu. Illness accounts for 39 percent of employees missing in action, according to the survey.

But then there are the creative types who just want an excuse to spend more time with their families. Others just want to spend more time in bed because the weather is too crappy to deal with. Or the procrastinators realize they need to get in some last minute holiday shopping.

So, what hilarious excuses are this generation of employees offering up as savory mind candy to their bosses? If I were their boss I would give them the day off just for creativity and the boldness to try to sell something so absolutely ridiculous.

The Social Poets: Funny Late Nite Jokes: GOP Gaffer Rick Perry

The Social Poets: Funny Late Nite Jokes: GOP Gaffer Rick Perry: From Denny: GOP 2012 candidate Rick Perry has been stepping on his tongue ever since he entered the race.

Considering how we here in Louisiana feel about the next door neighbor's bullying Texas culture, we Cajun types affectionately call "Shit Kickers," it could not have happened to a better politician.

After all, who has empathy for the guy who thought the BP Oil Spill was good event planning?

Dennys Art Sanctuary: 3 Awesome Advanced Halloween Makeup YouTube Tutorials

Dennys Art Sanctuary: 3 Awesome Advanced Halloween Makeup YouTube Tutorials: From Denny: Want to create your own fantasy Halloween makeup? Look no further as this one is awesome. She guides you through how to use spirit gum to attach the hair, concealer to zero out your eyebrows and blue eye shadow for your new skin color. For the spots she applies lash glue and then, after drying for about 30 minutes, she mixes up some black and blue lipstick to color the spots.

Check out how to create Neytiri Avatar and a sexy Vampire Princess too!

Ouch Outrageous Obnoxious and Odd: Funny Cartoon From Raymond Betancourt: When Cool Got Left Behind

Ouch Outrageous Obnoxious and Odd: Funny Cartoon From Raymond Betancourt: When Cool Got Left Behind: "From Denny: Definitely when old guys get into trouble at the golf course. It sure does make your brain revisit getting old and wondering if you really want to be part of the longevity generation. Time for a proper monkey scream. Hmmmm..."

The Social Poets: Funny Late Nite Jokes, Video, Cartoons: Bin Laden Porn Stash, Navy Seal Raid

Comic Conan O'Brien 

The Social Poets: Funny Late Nite Jokes, Video, Cartoons: Bin Laden Porn Stash, Navy Seal Raid: "From Denny: When America catches and kills off a long hated terrorist what is there to do but to make tasteless jokes about it? The late night comics are in full laughing mode, mocking the insanity. Of course, now, what we will do for macabre entertainment here in the West?

The speculation is already on in the military, intelligence and comedy communities - sometimes these guys really do echo each other in the most spooky ways - as to who takes over as Bin Laden's harried replacement. Colbert adds his funny voice to the world journalists, showing the possible replacement for World Terrorist."

Dennys Funny Quotes: Funny End Of The World Cartoons, Late Nite Jokes, Funny Videos

Photo by I'm Fantastic @ flickr

 

Dennys Funny Quotes: Funny End Of The World Cartoons, Late Nite Jokes, Funny Videos: "From Denny:  Like any responsible journalist I was waiting to make sure the end of the world did not arrive so I could report on it. Now that the end of the world has been rescheduled by an 89-year-old senile pastor until 21 October 2011 all news personnel are free to make mock."

Dennys Funny Quotes: Funny End Of The World Cartoons, Late Nite Jokes, Funny Videos

Photo by I'm Fantastic @ flickr

 

Dennys Funny Quotes: Funny End Of The World Cartoons, Late Nite Jokes, Funny Videos: "From Denny:  Like any responsible journalist I was waiting to make sure the end of the world did not arrive so I could report on it. Now that the end of the world has been rescheduled by an 89-year-old senile pastor until 21 October 2011 all news personnel are free to make mock."